Hell or Heal

by Alice Night

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credits

released May 8, 2019

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Alice Night Australia

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Track Name: Burn Your Lies
BURN YOUR LIES
We could spend our lives
trying to get things right
gotta ask ourselves who’s deciding
I slept right through
convinced all of you
and myself, till I fell
What a mess we’ve made
with the human state
the choice is ours
hell or heal
Can you love yourself
even when you’re wrong
can you stand and fail
‘cause you’ll have to
What makes you feel alive?
open eyes beam like a child
let sunlight go in
live the stuff of dreams
There’s no bad or good
there’s no final truth
just a moment shared
are you there?
There is sacrifice
in the sacred fire
can you burn your lies tonight?
What makes you feel alive?
open eyes beam like a child
let sunlight go in
live the stuff of dreams
Track Name: I'll Be There
I’LL BE THERE
Did you see the red blood moon
from the place in which you stood
or did the metal and the madness
mean it couldn’t get to you
Did you hear the mountain calling
how the dawn it knows your name
or did you turn your body over
choose to fall asleep again
I will be there, there, there
I will be there
Don’t say I don’t care, I do
And I’ll be there
Did you feel that sweet elation
when the baby learned to smile
or did you miss that fateful moment
trying to find your place in life
Did you touch the depths of love
hold the hunter’s weathered hand
or did you run back to your fortress
‘cause you couldn’t understand
Before the darkness takes our child
before the history takes our wild
before the damage takes our dreams
and life takes you from me
I will be there, there, there
I will be there
Don’t say I don’t care, I do
And I’ll be there
Did you taste sorry on your tongue
feel with them what you had done
or did you simply say the words
so you could sooner have your fun
Did you smell the springtime Jasmine
how it lets its flowers give
or did you walk by in a bubble
head down hungering how to live
Track Name: May The Wind
MAY THE WIND
Did you know, jealousy can kill
did you know, a child’s love can melt any heart in the room
did you know, forgiveness heals all wounds
did you know, I’m coming home soon
I didn’t know you thought you’d never love again
look at you now, smiling up at clouds - like a madman
I didn’t know your Mama died
if I’d have known, I’d have come to say good-bye
but just like you, she’s gone from me now
just like you, she’s all but disappeared
But it was your eyes I saw crying
it was you I held in the night
now you look at me blank-faced and say nothing happened
that it was all my fault anyway
sometimes the conversation is one way only
but I refuse to never trust again
Maybe it’s true we do live many lives
all wrapped up in one
you were a world, love is a place
and when I’m dreaming I still see your face
I didn’t know your Mama was dying
now you wake yourself up crying
and I’m not there to hold you now
may the wind still speak her name
may the wind still speak her name
But it was your eyes I saw crying
and it was you I held in the night
but it was your eyes I saw crying
and it was you I held in the night
May the wind still speak her name
may the wind still speak her name
may the wind still speak her name
Track Name: Sacred Safety
SACRED SAFETY
Why can’t a woman be home alone
without fearing
I don’t wanna keep my voice down
with the doors locked
in some kind of hiding
There’s a shadow in my dreams
but I’m gunna beam light from within
I’m gunna call the angels in
I’m gunna stand my ground and sing
When will the brothers take the lead
in keeping each other clear
create a world where we need not fear
when will the tides change truly
so we can learn to trust again
and we can learn to love again
I’m not afraid of the dark
I’m afraid of the pain people carry
the puppeteers and the hearts on strings
and the monster that we’ve made
There comes a time
gotta break the cycle
there comes a time
gotta break the chains
and learn to trust again
and learn to love again
Night breeze upon us
doors wide open
I’ll rest with my daughter
in sacred safety
Time has come
gotta break the cycle
time has come
gotta heal the pain
and learn to trust again
and learn to love again
Track Name: Geomorphology
GEOMORPHOLOGY
The changing ground
body ripples in collapse
brain crushed by itself
relentless relapse
relentless relapse
Your charisma wisdom speaks
and we gather in your wings
to witness how it is
when someone is truly themselves
truly themselves
in all their ugliness
missing teeth and a leering smile
from the shadows of this
pirate ship - this
Don’t talk to me like I am a child
I am water in every form
this planet blooming and unblooming
booming and unbooming
erupt crack split buckle bend swap fuck breathe
erupt crack split buckle bend swap fuck breathe
Tectonic plates shift daily
incremental changes
it’s been a big time lately
beneath the surface, beneath the surface of things
And I will learn calligraphy
just to paint perfect question marks all
over the street
and I hope they know - I hope they know it was me
Does the Earth ever get bored of itself
and wish it were Jupiter
a black hole or a star
‘cause I do, ‘cause I do, ‘cause I do
Don’t talk to me like I am a child
don’t talk to children like that either
this planet blooming and unblooming
booming and unbooming
this planet blooming and unblooming
booming and unbooming
Free to destroy or create in the subtle day-to-day
and the fire on the horizon is gaining on us
gaining on us, gaining on us
erupt crack split buckle bend swap fuck breathe
erupt crack split buckle bend swap fuck breathe
Track Name: King Of The World
KING OF THE WORLD
We’ll find there is an endpoint
only so long till we know
finite forgiveness
we’ll reap seeds we’ve sown
Humans and animals
are different in one way
they know their purpose
while ours is a missing case
But for now sun goes down
mesmerised by coloured clouds
but for now rain drops like pearls
for now we’re king of the world
Stars died some time ago
and we’re still catching up
light years away from us
perhaps God’s given up
Lifetimes of learning
will we realise when we die
that all our precious stories
were lived in oversight
But for now sun goes down
mesmerised by coloured clouds
but for now rain drops like pearls
for now we’re king of the world
Cast out and careless
we threw our hearts around
took the creatures from the ocean
took the treasures from the ground
It’s a dangerous game we’re playing
and what if we lose
some must fall for the future
but it won’t be me or you
Track Name: Factory Girl
FACTORY GIRL
Factory girl made her choices in a choiceless world
she’s empowered ‘cause she has to be
just ‘cause there’s no cage doesn’t mean you’re free
factory girl holds back her desire to hurl
for the money she’ll do what you say
collect your memories
she’ll collect her pay
Time and torment force her body like a slave
cash-flow capital
oh this is visceral
for some who feel the burden of bureaucracy
while daily we are losing our humanity
After all is said and done
big-game players had their fun
who’ll pick up the broken things
stitch new feathers to her wings
let her go, let her be
let her go, let her free
Mind numbing
heart strumming
breath quickens
get me out of here
Factory boy works the mine like it’s a giant toy
his body bears the weight of gold
he’s the pawn while all is bought and sold
Factory man nameless number
we just want his hands
shoot the weapon when we tell you to
the war’s not over till we say it’s through
After all is said and done
big-game players had their fun
who’ll pick up the broken things
stitch new feathers to his wings
let him go, let him be
let him go, let him free
Mind numbing
heart strumming
breath quickens
get me out of here
Track Name: Jelly Bean Tree
JELLY BEAN TREE
Lay your stones out on the ground
so we can play together
the colours and shapes that you’ve collected
trinkets and feathers
Oh, hand your heart out like a secret
we’ll pass it in our hands
we’ll pick out all those grains of hate
return them to the sands
Come set her free, jelly bean tree
jelly bean tree, jelly bean tree,
jelly bean tree, jelly bean tree
Erosion is necessity
wind and water weathers
but this heart inside my rib-cage
is sometimes too protected
Oh, pour your brains out in the pallet
we’ll play with all the patterns
we’ll figure out a cover story if
someone asks what happened
Come set her free, jelly bean tree
jelly bean tree, jelly bean tree,
jelly bean tree, jelly bean tree
If you fall first and I fall second
we cannot help each other
the moon in bloom my only saviour
body in the gutter
Jelly beans and chocolate buttons
dissolving in our blood-stream
we giggle and we kiss each other
theatre of our dreams
and there’s trees of sweets and sacred creatures
telling us to follow
but there’s something not quite right about this
your eyes are looking hollow
Come set her free, jelly bean tree
jelly bean tree, jelly bean tree,
jelly bean tree, jelly bean tree
Track Name: Get It Out
GET IT OUT
I can’t breathe with these thoughts in me
this is not the life I want to lead
this sickness is eating us up
if I’ll never be good enough might as well give up
it’s the same old cycles in a different time
Grandma wanted to stay beautiful and so she died
This does not belong to you
Get it out, get it out ooohhh
I’ve been hating on myself
blaming it on you
dancing in dark circles
a bully through and through
I say breasts like these were not made to please
and it’s only so long till they won’t meet his needs
this beauty beast keeps us locked away
defeats our lifeforce
chains us up in shame
I stare at women just to see where I fit
she beat me at some things but I beat her at hips
This does not belong to you
Get it out, get it out ooohhh
Fuck my person, fuck my thinking
fuck my kindness, fuck my dreams
cause we all know that these are not the
important things
if you won’t love me forever
then don’t bother today
I’ll make it easy for you
and push you away
I can see another way
meet each other and ourselves in full embrace
I’m sorry darling that I ruined our night
forcing you to justify the way you live your life
I’m sorry women that I blamed these things on you
I honour your essence and I honour your truth
Society may have us be enemies
but I want to walk beside you and
shape our dreams
Society may have us be enemies
but I want to walk beside you and
shape our dreams
Track Name: Nectar
NECTAR
The fire was their witness
of a silk that spun till dawn
the sacred artist smiling
to see such beauty form
This love like lightning
with friendship freedom sings
stories stir our hopefulness
with wisdom as our wings
Hold on tightly and let him show you
Hold on lightly and let her know you
There in the places they enter
the soul delights to grow
mountain meets with ocean
with always more to know
Held in the breast like a vision
the Jacarandas bloom
all of our natures forgiven
casting hearts beneath the moon
Hold on tightly and let her show you
Hold on lightly and let him know you
Committing love eternal to one
pure precious friend
revealing self to other
and into self ascend
The nectar of this union
majestic like the rain
and we praise the holy rhythms
that they’ve found each other again
Hold on tightly and let him show you
Hold on lightly and let her know you
Track Name: Coming Home
COMING HOME
Home, home, home
Coming home is the reason for living this
remembering and forgetting kind of life
She draws me to her
to swim in her blissful light of love
yet I know her here now
yet I know her here now
Then I leave the harsh reality of this physical body
distract and I forget
yet I know her here now
yet I know her here now
Big picture where am I needed most
does it matter
it’s all the same place anyway
I am torn to stay in this body
from some deep crevice inside
love can heal this body
love can heal this body
love can heal this body
exciting me as to what’s next here on this earth
Big picture where am I needed most
does it matter
it’s all the same place anyway
Love is here, love is here
and the journey will play itself out
my devoted soul must be patient
and return to the blissful light of love now
my devoted soul must be patient
and return to the blissful light of love now
my devoted soul must be patient
and return to the blissful light of love now
Coming home is the reason for living this
remembering and forgetting kind of life
Home, home, home, home
(Lyrics by Gabrielle Armondo)
Track Name: Rainbow Song
RAINBOW SONG
You ask if we all feel we’re at the centre
of the rainbow
the truth is I don’t feel I’m at the centre
of anything
Can I have just one thing
just one thing
just for me
We’re stealing conversations
in the hallways
flash of freedom
so far I’ve loved each sentence and each pause
that you gave
I know I’m not the centre of your rainbow
or your dreams
peripheral epiphany
I can sing your harmonies
blink my tears and dust my knees
see where music carries me
and get on with my life
Can I have just one thing
just one thing
just for me
Can I have just one night
just one night
just for me
I’ve been trying to make the world a better place
with my lyrics and my poems
but the happiest I ever feel is
stroking dogs and talking real
lovingly preparing meals
running shapes into the fields
face-paint dragons gold and teal
living my own life
Can I give just one night, just one night
just to you
Can I give just one thing, just one thing
just to you
You ask me if I feel I’m at the centre of the rainbow
I tell you actually I feel a little to one side
I’m home alone with indigo, violet, crimson on the go
watching stars through closed windows
admit the things I cannot know
cut up colours, learn to sew
make a patchwork rainbow
and sleep in the centre of myself

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